My fellow BIB needed to get beautified and asked if her little one can come here for a playdate while she goes. I say,"Sure why not!" The girls are BFF's now and haven't seen too much of each other. Little JJ had strep( so she's on antibiotics and safe) and we've been busy with sports and other stuff. My daughter was sooo excited. How could I say no!?! We all need to look hot while we can right? And I'm sure I'll need the favor in return.So JJ drops off little one and everything starts off great. They get into their play mode and are ridic they are so cute! They usually spend a great deal of time with Polly Pockets or Barbies in different scenarios. Today was playing house and talking a lot about the dolls using the toilet. Hmmm...sh*t this is great! They entertain themselves and even go to the potty together to keep each other company. Sound familiar girls? lol
Lunch was typical RR style...Cheese with breadstick dippers snack followed with hot cocoa with double the 'shmellows....(what???like you never just gave whatever they want to make everyone happy! No organics here any DM's reading this..I did try to offer a healthier alternative but pork rinds weren't a fav.)
They got their food groups....milk, sugar, starch, proteinish.....After that they wanted candy hearts. My little one loved them! Apparently little JJ had never had them (WTF) and didn't like them so much. Very nicely in her little munchkin voice she says, "RR, I don't like these"...so of course I say, "Ok so don't eat anymore." What I didn't realize was that by saying, "I don't like these" means, "can I spit these into your hand?" Ewww...I used a napkin while tiny chunks of candy hearts kept drooling out of her mouth. Ok, my fault for giving them these after the other sugar. 15 minutes later, she came up to me again, it wasn't over, she still had more in her mouth. WTF! All that she said was "here," but she's so cute I can't say no. So I took the chunks to the garbage and all seemed to go smoothly for a while. Yah, I can send them upstairs and get my bathrooms cleaned.
Now the girls proceed to the usual third part of the playdate, the dress up in gowns and rehearse for a show! They chose their dresses without any arguing, and I even put makeup on them. They then started practicing a play just for me supposedly. Well I already know a show will never happen because after a short time, they get unruly and decide to quit because Polly Pockets are right there! I was right...Didn't ask about the show BUT considering what happened next, I guess I should have:).
Little JJ needs a tissue. She has BOOGIES. I come to the rescue and ask her to blow her nose like a pro,... done...then a few more times....ok can handle it. Hey it could be worse! It could be green huge boogers dried up! Now I can go back to my exercise of the day, cleaning my bathrooms. I know, I know...lame
All is good and quiet after they go to my princesses room. They want to watch a movie. “Ok,” I tell them, “just don't sit on top of each other(ok I know thats DM style but if lil JJ's boogers are an indication of what's to come, no thanks). I find my BIT, set up her dvd player with headphones, and didn't think about it until later
when I realized later that poor little JJ can't hear if mine has headphones on! Duh! I go in there to correct the issue and see little JJ has a very large green crustacean plugging up her nostril...HMMM can I leave it? Bibs is coming in about an hour...turns out I just can't leave it alone, in fear that this thing is corklike and will explode across the room at any given moment! So I say blow again, thinking this is the "biggie" and once it comes out she'll be fine. But nooo..she blew into the tissue and only a small amount came out. Apparently it was a very intense BOOGER and green! Arghh...so after blowing and blowing and I finally said f*ck it and went in there to try to retrieve it. “OMFG!" It kept coming out and coming out and so on...and all I can compare it to is the magic trick with the the 'ol handkerchief when the magician keeps pulling and pulling and it takes all day to come out!
Finally My BIBS calls to ask how things are, and she'll come pick up her BIT, or if they're having fun, have her stay a bit longer. Gosh, as much as I love the girls playing, there was a lot going on in my mind. And of course I tell JJ the story and just to further prove she's SO not a DM but a true BM, she laughed her ass off when I told her and agreed to just have her older BIT come over in a half hour or so and get her. The DM choice would have been to plead how sorry she is and bring a basket of cookies .....but that's why I love the B*tch! Soon after, her daughter and a friend come through my backdoor in the below zero wind chill with open jackets and gym shoes walking through the snow and ice.
It is always my pleasure, but don't forget when you least expect it...my BIT will be at your house when there is some bodily fluid malfunction! And I'll be walking in, all beautiful from my facial, hair, and nails:) So until then...Hasta Beotches